Family Safety - Keeping Children Safe: From Toddler to Teen
Setting the Awareness Foundation Early- A Family Mission
I’ll never forget seeing a car covered in bumper stickers, each one giving away pieces of the family’s life, from their kids’ sports teams to where they went to school. It may have seemed harmless, but in reality it was practically a roadmap for strangers. Combine this kind of oversharing with today’s social media, and you’re handing out a direct map to your family. Even if you don’t see bumper stickers as often anymore, it’s a powerful reminder: Always be aware of the information you’re putting out into the world.
Teaching Your Children Situational Awareness, Trusting Their Instincts, and Playing the “What If” Game: The Sooner the Better
It’s becoming more and more common to hear about “The Red Zone”- the first four months of college when the majority of sexual assaults occur. I’ve even compiled a full manual on strategies for students who are away from home for the first time. But the truth is, your child’s safety doesn’t begin at college, it starts on day one.
As the Agent in Charge (AIC) of your family’s safety and security, you can begin teaching your children about awareness from a very young age. Children are naturally observant and intuitive, but they need guidance to recognize what their instincts are telling them and the confidence to act on those feelings. This is sometimes called listening to their “internal GPS.”
One of the most effective tools is the “What If” game- a simple way to talk through everyday scenarios in a calm, non-scary way. By asking questions like “What if someone you don’t know offers you a ride?” or “What if you get separated from me in a store?” you give your child a chance to think through safe responses before they ever face a real situation. Over time, this builds their confidence to react, and the ability to trust their instincts.
No one knows your child better than you. The following scenarios are guides to help start the conversation and examples you can adjust for your child’s age, personality, and specific needs. The earlier you begin these conversations, the more natural and instinctive situational awareness will become. A child who learns to notice their surroundings, recognize unsafe behavior, set healthy boundaries, and have a plan for how to handle situations is far more likely to stay safe as they grow older and begin making decisions on their own. Remember, these aren’t one-time talks; they are ongoing lessons woven into everyday life and reinforced through practice and trust.
The What If Game: 5 Key Safety Scenarios for Kids
1. Separated at a Park, Mall, or Store
Parent: “What if you look up and can’t see me in the store?”
Child might say: “I’d look for you.”
Parent reinforces: “Yes, but remember, don’t wander. Stay where you are for a minute. If you still don’t see me, go to someone safe. Who would that be?”
Child: “A worker with a name tag.”
Parent: “Exactly. Or a mom with kids. Never leave the building, just go to our meeting spot by the front counter. Let’s walk there together so you know it.” Point out a clear marker, easy for them to recognize and remember.
Instinct Check-In: “When you couldn’t find me, how would your body feel? Scared? Nervous? Those feelings are your alarm system. Listen to them, then follow our plan.”
2. Stranger or Acquaintance Offers a Ride
Parent: “What if someone you kind of know-like a neighbor, a coach, or one of Daddy’s friends- offers you a ride home?”
Child: “I’d say no.”
Parent: “Good. What words would you use?”
Child: (practice saying firmly): “No! I’m not allowed to go with you!”
Parent: “Perfect. Then what would you do?”
Child:
“Go back inside the school and tell a teacher or staff member.”
“If I can’t get back inside, I’ll go to the closest safe place we’ve talked about, like Grandma’s, Mrs. Smith’s house, or another trusted adult nearby.”
Parent: “Exactly. Even if they say it’s an emergency, or claim that Mom or Dad told them to pick you up- you never go. No exceptions. Remember the family password. If there’s really an emergency, we will tell you ourselves, or the designated family guardian we’ve already talked about will come for you. Never a random person, only someone trusted by our family.”
Instinct Check-In: “If someone offered you a ride, how would you know if it didn’t feel right? What feelings would warn you?”
3. An Adult Says: “This is Our Secret”
Parent: “What if someone tells you, ‘Don’t tell your parents, this is our secret’?”
Child: “I’d tell you anyway.”
Parent: “Exactly right. Adults never keep secrets with kids. Surprises are okay-like birthday presents- but secrets are not. What could you say to that adult?”
Child (practice): “I don’t keep secrets from my parents.”
Parent: “Yes! And you’d come to me right away. You’ll never get in trouble for telling.”
Instinct Check-In: “How do you think your body would feel if someone asked you to keep a secret like that? Would you feel uneasy, nervous, or heavy inside? That’s your signal to tell me.”
4. Someone Makes You Feel Uncomfortable
Parent: “What if someone touches you or says something that makes you feel weird or scared?”
Child: “I’d say stop.”
Parent: “Yes, say it loudly: ‘Stop! Don’t touch me!’ Then what do you do?”
Child: “Leave and tell you.”
Parent: “Perfect. Even if it’s someone we know, you can always come to me. You’re never in trouble for telling.”
Instinct Check-In: “Notice if your stomach feels tight, your heart races, or you feel like running away; those are signals to act right away.”
5. Someone Uses a Trick to Lure You
Parent: “What if someone says, ‘Help me find my puppy’ or ‘Your mom told me to pick you up’?”
Child: “I’d say no.”
Parent: “Yes-loudly. What words could you use?”
Child (practice shouting): “I don’t know you! Stay away!”
Parent: “Good. Then what?”
Child: “Run to a safe place-like back inside the school or to another family.”
Parent: “Exactly. Safe adults don’t ask kids for help, and no one picks you up unless I told you first.”
Instinct Check-In: “If someone tried this trick, what would your gut tell you? What feeling would warn you it’s not right?”
Parent Tip: Repetition is the Secret Ingredient
Children forget quickly, and that’s normal. Their brains are still developing, and even when they seem to “get it,” safety lessons need to be reinforced often. You may feel like you’re repeating yourself to the point of being annoying- but that’s exactly how it sticks. Think of it the same way kids learn to brush their teeth, tie their shoes, or say “please and thank you.”
Instead of long lectures, weave safety reminders into daily life in short bursts:
Car rides: “What would you do if someone you don’t know asked you for help?”
Bedtime talks: A quick 2-minute “what if” scenario before stories.
At the store or park: Each time you go somewhere new, pick a meeting spot. Because every store and every park is different, this must be repeated every time. New surroundings = new plan.
On the walk to school or practice: “If you felt unsafe right now, what could you do?”
The goal is to make the response automatic, like reflexes or fire drills. When children practice in little pieces over time, they build confidence and instinctive reactions.
Remember: Your child may roll their eyes, but deep down, repetition reassures them that you’re serious about their safety. And one day, that “annoying reminder” might be what helps them make the right choice under pressure.
Teaching Children to Trust Their Instincts
Too often, parents introduce a child to someone and encourage them to say hello or give the adult a hug, even when the child is hesitant. Sometimes, well-meaning adults may insist by saying things like “just be nice.” While this might seem polite, it can unintentionally teach children to override their instincts, their internal GPS that warns them when something doesn’t feel right.
Instead of forcing the interaction, respect your child’s hesitation. If you find yourself in such a situation, use it as a teaching moment. Later, have a calm discussion with your child. Ask questions like:
“What were you feeling in that moment?”
“What made you feel that way?”
“What would you like to do if that happens again?”
By doing this, you’re not only validating their emotions but also reinforcing that their instincts are valuable and should never be ignored.
It’s also important to give your children age-appropriate tools for responding when they feel uncomfortable. Younger children can practice saying “No, thank you” or stepping behind a parent. Older children and teens can learn to set boundaries with phrases like “I don’t feel comfortable with that.” This empowers them to protect themselves in future situations when you may not be there to intervene.
Above all, remind your children that their safety is more important than politeness. Teaching them from a young age to trust their instincts can be one of the most powerful layers of protection you give them as they grow into independent and confident adults.
The “What If” Game and the 10-Second Rule
One of the most effective ways to build awareness is by combining the “What If” game with the 10-Second Rule. Together, they give children a simple, repeatable framework for checking in with their instincts and making safer choices.
The rule is simple: whenever you enter a new environment, stop, look, listen, and count down from ten. In those ten seconds, ask a quick “what if” question: “What if someone asked me to leave with them?” or “What if I got separated from Mom right now?”
This short pause not only heightens awareness but also trains kids to think ahead without feeling scared or pressured. It becomes a natural way of practicing safety in everyday life.
Everyday Moments for Safety Check-Ins
Here are natural times to drop in a quick scenario, safety reminder, and practice the 10-Second Rule- without it feeling forced:
As soon as we get into the car- The first step: lock the doors.
Parking the car- Stop, look, listen, and count down from 10 before getting out.
Walking through a parking lot- Look around for cars, and notice if someone seems too close or is hiding.
At the grocery store checkout line- Take 10 seconds to scan the people around you.
Dropping off at school or practice- Ask, “What if someone other than me tried to pick you up?”
Heading into a friend’s house- Check in: “What if you start feeling uncomfortable, what would you do?”
Visiting a new park, mall, or movie theater- Take 10 seconds to spot exits or safe places.
Loading the car after shopping- Is anyone approaching? Is someone too close?
While waiting for food at a restaurant- Play out: “What if we needed to leave quickly-how would we do it?”
Each of these everyday moments becomes a natural chance to strengthen awareness. Over time, the “What If” game paired with the 10-Second Rule trains children to trust their instincts, stay alert, and develop a personal safety mindset that will serve them for life.
Building Observation Skills with “Kim’s Game”
Another powerful tool you can teach your children is a memorization and observation exercise known as Kim’s Game. Originally popularized in Rudyard Kipling’s novel Kim (1901), the game was used to train spies in memory and detail recognition. Since then, it has been adopted by the military, scouts, and survival instructors around the world as a way to sharpen observation skills.
How Kim’s Game Works:
Traditionally, a number of small items (keys, coins, a pen, a toy, etc.) are placed on a tray. The child looks at the tray for 30–60 seconds, then the items are covered. The challenge is to remember as many objects as possible. This simple exercise teaches children to slow down, take notice, and build a mental “snapshot” of their environment.
How to Apply Kim’s Game in Everyday Life:
You don’t need a tray of objects, real-world settings are perfect practice opportunities. Instead of random memorization, you can play the game in natural environments:
At a restaurant: Ask, “Do you remember the woman at the next table with the blue shirt? Can you tell me three other things you noticed about her or the people around her?”
Exploring a new space: After visiting a park, mall, or restaurant, ask, “What were three things you noticed about the space? Could you find the exits again?”
Driving in the car: Point out a vehicle and ask, “What did you notice about that black truck next to us? Did it have stickers, dents, or something unusual?”
During family walks: Pause and ask, “If you had to describe this street corner to someone, what three details would you mention?”
Why It Matters:
Kim’s Game strengthens both memory and awareness. For children, it helps turn passive looking into active seeing. This skill is invaluable if they ever need to recall details about a suspicious person, describe a vehicle, or remember their surroundings in an emergency. It also builds confidence - children learn that they can notice and remember things most people overlook.
Over time, practicing Kim’s Game, the What If Game, and the 10-Second Rule creates a powerful trio of tools that build lifelong awareness. By teaching these habits early, you give your child the confidence to trust their instincts, recognize danger, and make safer choices. It’s one of the best ways to prepare them for independence and gives you peace of mind knowing they’ll be better equipped to protect themselves when you’re not there.
Hidden Tracking Devices: “AirTags and Children: A New Threat Parents Can’t Ignore”
In today’s world, technology designed for convenience can also be misused for harm. A recent case illustrates just how real this danger can be.
A family visiting the Tennessee Aquarium in Chattanooga made a terrifying discovery: their child had an Apple AirTag slipped into his pocket by a stranger. The device was found only after leaving the aquarium, raising the alarming possibility that someone had been attempting to track the child and, potentially, the family’s home. Security immediately became involved, and police were notified.
This story is a stark reminder that predators don’t always approach children with words; they may use technology to stalk or track them. The idea that someone got close enough to plant a device in a child’s pocket is proof that vigilance is essential, even in family-friendly spaces.
What Parents Should Do
Check belongings regularly. After outings to crowded places, quickly inspect children’s pockets, jackets, bags, and toys.
Know how to disable AirTags. Twist off the back and remove the battery to shut down the device.
Report immediately. Turn the tracker over to law enforcement so they can investigate and trace ownership.
Leverage detection apps. iPhones automatically alert you if an unknown AirTag is following you. For Android users, Apple’s free Tracker Detect app can scan for nearby devices.
Teach awareness. Make pocket checks or bag scans part of your child’s safety routine, frame it as another “10-Second Rule” habit.
Why This Matters
The AirTag incident is a wake-up call. Safety isn’t just about watching for strangers in public; it’s also about understanding how technology can be exploited. A simple moment of awareness could stop a predator’s plan before it even begins.
Back-to-School Safety Tips for Younger Children
The excitement of a new school year often comes with new backpacks, lunch boxes, and those “first day of school” photos that parents love to share. While these moments are precious, they can also unintentionally put your child at risk. Here are some important safety considerations to help you protect your children as they head back to class:
1. Think Twice Before Posting Back-to-School Photos
The Risk: A single picture can contain more information than you realize. Parents often post photos with signs or captions displaying their child’s name, grade, teacher, and school, essentially a roadmap for predators. Even a photo in front of the school sign or bus stop can reveal your exact location.
What to Do Instead:
If you want to share a photo, keep the background neutral (inside your home or backyard).
Avoid including school logos, uniforms, or identifiable landmarks.
Share photos only with trusted family/friends via private messages or albums, not on public feeds.
Rule of Thumb: Before posting, ask yourself: Would I be comfortable handing this exact information to a stranger on the street?
2. Avoid Names on Backpacks, Lunch Boxes, or Clothing
The Risk: Predators know that using a child’s name instantly breaks down barriers. If someone calls your child by name, it makes the child believe the person knows them, and they may be more likely to follow or trust them.
What to Do Instead:
Use initials, fun patches, or keychains for personalization.
If names are necessary for identification at school, write them inside the bag or on a hidden label, not on the outside where strangers can see.
3. Reinforce Stranger Safety with Real Examples
The Risk: Even if you’ve taught your child about “stranger danger,” a friendly voice using their name can override caution. Many predators use phrases like:
“Your mom asked me to pick you up, Emily.”
“Your dad is hurt, come with me, Sarah.”
“Your parents told me to pick you up, but I just can’t remember the password…”
What to Do Instead:
Teach your child a family password system: If someone other than Mom or Dad is picking them up, that person must know the password- No Exceptions.
Role-play these scenarios in short “what if” games so your child practices saying NO and walking away confidently.
Remind them: Never share the family password with anyone, not even friends.
4. Protect School Routines
The Risk: Posting about your child’s daily schedule (“first day on the bus,” “after-school soccer,” etc.) creates a predictable pattern that someone could exploit.
What to Do Instead:
Keep routines off social media.
Share schedule changes only with trusted friends and family.
Remind your child to always check in with you before leaving school with anyone, even if it seems normal.
5. Practice “Check-In” Habits Early
Teach children from kindergarten on to always:
Check in with a parent/guardian before leaving school grounds with anyone.
Call or text upon arrival at an after-school activity or friend’s house.
Know exactly who is allowed to pick them up.
Parent Tip: Children thrive on routine. Just like brushing teeth, making these safety habits part of daily life from a young age will normalize them so that when they’re older, the behaviors are second nature.
Scenario: Sleepovers at a Friend’s House
After knowing what I know now, I would be extremely selective about whose house I would ever allow my kids to sleep over at. In fact, for many families, the safest answer is a hard NO. You never truly know what happens behind closed doors: who else lives in the home, what other adults may come and go, whether firearms are stored responsibly, or whether supervision is consistent.
If you do decide to allow a sleepover, put safety first:
Vet the Household Thoroughly
Know the parents personally and have ongoing communication.
Ask direct questions: “Will you be home the entire night? Who else will be in the house? Do you have unsecured firearms, alcohol, or older siblings/friends coming over?”
Trust your instincts, if something feels off, decline politely.
Establish a Safe Word
Have a prearranged code word or phrase your child can call or text you at any time.
This allows them to leave discreetly without embarrassment. Example: “How’s the dog?” might mean come pick me up now.
Give Permission to Call Anytime
Make it clear: If something feels off, you can call me, even at 2 AM and I will come get you, no questions asked.
Children need to know they won’t be scolded or punished for wanting to leave.
Run Through “What Ifs” Together
“What if another adult asks you to keep a secret?” → The answer is always tell Mom or Dad immediately. Adults should never ask children to keep secrets.
“What if your friend wants to sneak out, drink, or do something unsafe?” → Your child should know it’s okay to refuse and use the safe word.
“What if you feel uncomfortable but can’t explain why?” → Instincts matter. That’s enough reason to call home.
Trust Their Gut
Teach them: If your stomach feels funny, if something seems wrong, or if you just feel like you don’t want to be there, it’s okay to leave.
Parent Tip: Alternatives to Sleepovers
If you prefer not to do sleepovers, suggest safe alternatives:
A late playdate or “pajama party” where you pick them up at 9 or 10 PM.
Hosting sleepovers at your house, where you control the environment.
Setting up group activities with trusted families.
Your child may feel left out occasionally, but the trade-off is their safety. As they mature, they’ll understand why you made that decision.
The Bark Phone: A Safer Way for Kids to Stay Connected
As children grow, many families reach a point where having a dedicated phone for emergencies becomes essential. This should not, however, come at the expense of safety or peace of mind. That’s where the Bark Phone comes in: a device designed from the ground up with robust, tamper‑proof parental controls baked in.
What Is the Bark Phone?
The Bark Phone is a smartphone built to look and act like a standard device, but with a key difference: it has Bark’s full-suite parental control software embedded directly into the system. That means:
You can’t delete or bypass the controls- they stay firmly in place no matter what.
It doubles as a premium parental control dashboard, replacing the need for separate apps that kids may try to work around.
How Bark Gives Parents More Control
1. Approve or Deny Everything
Contacts- You decide who your child can call or text.
Apps- Your child must request app downloads, and you can approve or deny each one.
Web & App Access- Block entire categories of content or limit access to trusted apps and sites.
2. Set Boundaries That Can't Be Broken
Screen Time Limits & Scheduling- You control when apps are available (e.g., during school, homework, bedtime).
Driving Mode- Automatically locks (pauses) the Bark Phone when it detects the device is in a moving vehicle (i.e., moving at car speed), helping reduce distracted driving.
Remote Pause & Lock- Instantly disable the device from your parent dashboard if misuse is suspected.
3. Monitor for Concerning Content
Built‑in AI monitors texts, emails, photos, videos, and social media for warning signs like bullying, self‑harm, predator grooming, or suicidal ideation. When it detects potential issues, you receive alerts.
4. Location and Safety Features
GPS Tracking & Alerts- See your child’s location in real time, and receive check-in and geofence notifications.
Emergency Contact Access- Calls to designated emergency contacts go through, even when the device is paused.
5. Expandable as Your Child Grows
You can begin with a Starter Plan- talk and text only, no internet access for younger children. As they mature, upgrade to Advanced Plans that allow limited apps and browser access, all managed under your supervision.
Why the Bark Phone Stands Out
Tamper‑proof controls mean your rules are durable, even for tech-savvy kids.
Centralized, AI-driven monitoring helps you stay informed about real issues, without intruding on every conversation.
Adjusts with your family- from early childhood to teen years, it evolves with a simple setting change.
Parent Caveat
While many praise Bark for balance between safety and privacy, some parents worry about the level of surveillance. As with any tool, it works best when paired with open, trust-based conversations about boundaries, privacy, and respectful use.
“The Dark Side of Gaming Platforms: Predator Tactics and Real Cases”
Predators actively use online games, social media, and chat platforms to target and groom children.
Real Life Examples of Predators on Gaming Platforms
Legal Actions Against Roblox
Louisiana Lawsuit (Aug 2025): Louisiana’s Attorney General sued Roblox for creating an environment where sexual predators “thrive, unite, hunt and victimize kids.” The suit cites predators using voice-altering software to pose as children. Prosecutors argue the platform’s safety protocols are too weak and putting young users at risk. Allegations are that the platform prioritizes growth and revenue over child protection.
Georgia Lawsuit: A 9-year-old boy was reportedly groomed over several months, resulting in extortion and trauma. The suit claims Roblox's inadequate safety measures and poor age verification allowed predators to manipulate children.
Texas Lawsuit (Galveston): A mother accuses Roblox and Discord of enabling grooming that led to her teenage daughter's assault. The predator began contact on Roblox and later moved conversations to Discord.
Michigan Lawsuit: Allegations include predator grooming in exchange for in-game currency and luring kids into sharing sexual content. The lawsuit asserts Roblox failed to implement sufficient identity verification and oversight.
Broader Patterns on Roblox and Similar Platforms
Tracking & Critiques: Investigations have accused Roblox of insufficient moderation, creating an environment ripe for sexual exploitation.
Law Enforcement Cases: Since early 2025, at least six people in the U.S. have been arrested for using Roblox to locate and exploit children.
Virtual Abuse in VR: Beyond Roblox, reports exist of users being sexually assaulted in virtual environments like Horizon Worlds and VRChat, revealing broader challenges in holding platforms accountable for virtual grooming.
Context & Grooming Tactics
Law Enforcement Warning: Internet Crimes Against Children Task Forces confirm that predators exploit online anonymity in games and social media, often posing as peers in order to gain trust.
Grooming Trends: Groomers use tactics like emotional manipulation ("love bombing"), secrecy, coercion, and threats. They often ask to move conversations to less-monitored platforms and may manipulate children into sending explicit content or meeting in person.
Extortion Risks: Sextortion is a growing concern, predators use explicit content to blackmail teens into sending money or more explicit material.
References
Associated Press – Louisiana sues Roblox alleging the popular gaming site fails to protect children
LinkBusiness Insider – Roblox accused of being a 'hunting ground' for child predators as legal firestorm against gaming giant intensifies
LinkHouston Chronicle – Galveston mom's lawsuit accuses Roblox, Discord of enabling predator to groom, assault teen daughter
LinkThe Sun – Roblox lawsuit: children preyed upon by predators posing as peers
LinkBloomberg – Roblox’s pedophile problem investigation
LinkWikipedia – Roblox (law enforcement cases)
LinkWikipedia – Virtual crime (assault in VR platforms)
LinkOSI News – AFOSI takes down online predators, warns parents
LinkMaricopa County Attorney’s Office – Cyber Predators: Real Risks
Link
Protect Your Children Online (Roblox & Beyond)
Parents must take proactive steps to create a safe digital environment. Below are strategies that combine hands-on involvement, technology tools, and household rules to protect your children.
1. Join the Game
Create your own Roblox account.
Play alongside your child to see what they see.
Learn how players can contact each other.
By doing this, you’ll better understand the risks and how predators may attempt to reach your child. It also shows your child you are involved and paying attention.
2. Turn on Account Restrictions
Go to Settings → Security → Enable “Account Restrictions.”
This limits access to age-appropriate games only.
Parenting Tip: Remind your child that every device in the home (computer, phone, console, TV) belongs to you. They are allowed to use them, but you are in charge. Setting this expectation early reinforces healthy boundaries.
3. Control the Chat
Go to Settings → Privacy → Who can chat: choose “Friends Only” or “No One.”
Predators often use chat features to manipulate children into sharing personal details, sending photos, or even arranging meetups.
Disabling or limiting chat greatly reduces this risk.
4. Audit the Friends List Weekly
Open the “Friends List” with your child.
Ask: “Do you know this person in real life?”
If the answer is no, remove them.
Children often accept random friend requests without realizing the danger. Make auditing friends a weekly routine.
5. Secure the Home Network with a Firewall
A firewall is like a digital security guard that filters which connections are allowed in and out of your home network. It’s one of the most important defenses families can use.
Types of Firewalls for Families:
Router Firewalls (built-in): Most Wi-Fi routers have a basic firewall. These hide your devices’ addresses from the internet and block unsolicited traffic.
Software Firewalls: Built into operating systems like Windows or macOS. They control which apps on that device can connect to the internet.
Dedicated Family Firewalls (best option): Hardware or subscription-based tools designed for homes. They allow you to:
Block unsafe or adult sites.
Set internet time limits for specific devices.
Monitor which sites/devices your child is accessing.
Enforce parental controls across the entire household.
Examples include Circle Home Plus, Gryphon Guardian, or Firewalla. These devices plug directly into your home network and give parents control through an app.
A firewall works best when combined with parental monitoring apps (like Bark, Qustodio, or Net Nanny). They give you both network-level protection and device-level supervision.
6. Sandbox the Device
Dedicate one device (tablet, console, or laptop) for Roblox or similar games.
Do not allow it to be used for open web browsing, email, or social media.
Set time limits on that device through parental controls or the firewall.
This reduces the chances of a predator luring your child “off platform” into riskier areas.
7. Teach the Hard Rules
Your child needs clear, non-negotiable rules for online play. Review them often:
Never click outside links inside Roblox or chat windows.
Never join off-platform chats (Discord, WhatsApp, Snapchat, etc.). These apps often have disappearing messages that predators exploit.
Never share personal information-no real names, photos, school names, addresses, or phone numbers.
Never agree to meet online friends in real life.
8. Household Hard Rules for Safer Gaming
Keep gaming devices in common areas, not bedrooms.
Require children to keep one ear uncovered while using headsets so they stay aware of their environment.
Place screens where parents can see them at a glance.
Set digital curfews and enforce device charging in a central location overnight.
Conduct random spot checks of games, friends lists, and chats.
Explain: “Online friends are not real-life visitors.” Role play scenarios where a child practices how to say no or disengage when uncomfortable.
Use family device mirroring, parental controls, or monitoring apps when needed.
Establish a family safe word: if your child feels uncomfortable online, they can say it and you’ll know to intervene immediately.
Hold family meetings to discuss online activity, new games, and any concerns.
Protecting children online takes a layered approach-parental involvement, technical safeguards (firewalls, parental apps, account restrictions), and teaching children hard rules. Technology alone isn’t enough, but when combined with active parenting and open conversations, you dramatically reduce the risks.
Cracking the Code: Understanding Teen Slang, Acronyms, and Emojis
Today’s kids and teens live in a digital world where their conversations often happen in texts, DMs, gaming chats, and social platforms. To stay ahead of parents and teachers, many have developed their own “language”. They use acronyms, numbers, and emojis to hide the true meaning of what they’re saying. While some of this shorthand is harmless, others can signal risky behavior, ranging from drug use, sexting, or arranging in-person meetings with strangers, to cries for help around mental health.
For parents, learning this coded language is not about spying- it’s about staying connected, protecting your child, and keeping communication open. By understanding what these symbols mean, you’ll be better prepared to spot red flags early, start important conversations, and intervene before something becomes dangerous.
Big caveat: Slang Shifts Fast and meanings depend on context. The items below are widely documented by safety orgs and updated guides. Keep the conversation open and ask what your child meant before reacting.
Secrecy/“Parents Nearby”
POS = Parent over shoulder
PIR = Parent in room
PAW/PAL = Parents are watching/listening
P911 = Parent alert
9 / 99 = Parent watching / parent gone (appears on some media lists)
Grooming/Sexting Red Flags
ASL = Age/sex/location
LMIRL/MIRL = (Let’s) meet in real life
GNOC/NIFOC = Get naked on cam / Naked in front of computer
IWSN = I want sex now
WTTP = Want to trade pics?
FYEO = For your eyes only (often tied to explicit images)
GYPO = Get your pants off
CU46 / 53X = “See you for sex” / “sex” in leetspeak
Context: these are classic grooming markers-Treat As Serious.
Self-Harm/Mental-Health Alerts
KMS/KYS = Kill myself / kill yourself (Take Seriously, Assess Context)
Sex/Relationships (general slang that may accompany risk)
DTF (down to …),
FWB (friends with benefits)
Body count, Smash-”having sex”
THOT-“That Ho Over There.”
Trap phone (aka burner; kids sometimes use a spare to evade rules)
Sexual-Emoji Shortcuts (often paired with nude-sharing or sexting)
🍆/🍌 = penis;
🌮/😼 = vagina;
🍑 = butt;
💦/🥜 = ejaculation;
👀 = sending/looking at nudes;
🌽/⬛🟧 = porn/Pornhub;
😈/👅/🥵/🤤 often sexual tone.
Source: Parents.com 2025 emoji guide (fact-checked; cites Bark + research).
Drug-Related Words & Emojis Parents Should Know
Today’s youth often use slang words and emojis as a kind of “code” when talking about drugs. Many of these might look innocent but can actually point to dangerous behavior. Below is a reference guide for parents:
🔑 Common Slang Terms
Plug = Dealer (the person who supplies drugs).
Gas = Strong, high-quality marijuana.
Lean = A drink made from prescription-strength cough syrup with codeine/promethazine mixed with soda/candy. Highly addictive.
Xans = Xanax (alprazolam), a prescription anti-anxiety medication often abused for its sedative effect.
Percs = Percocet (oxycodone + acetaminophen), a powerful opioid painkiller.
⚠️ Street versions of “Xans” and “Percs” are often counterfeit pills laced with fentanyl, making them especially deadly.
🌿 Marijuana / Weed
Words: Gas, Trees, Herb, Kush
Emojis:
🌿 🍁 🌴 💨 🚬
❄️ Cocaine
Words: Snow, Blow, Yayo
Emojis:
❄️ ⛄ 🎱 🥥
💉 Heroin
Words: Smack, Dope, H, Horse
Emojis:
💉 🐎 🥀
💊 Pills (Xanax, Percocet, Oxy, etc.)
Words: Xans, Bars, Percs, Oxys
Emojis:
💊 🔵 🟦 💠
🍄 Psychedelics
Words: Shrooms, Acid, Lucy (LSD)
Emojis:
🍄 🌈 👁
🚬 Vaping / Nicotine
Words: Vape, Juul, Stig
Emojis:
🚬 💨 🔋
💊 Adderall (Stimulant / “Study Drug”)
What It Is: Prescription amphetamine for ADHD; abused as a “study drug” or party stimulant.
Words/Slang: Addys, Study Buddies, Smarties, Uppers
Emojis:
⚡ 📚 🔋 💯 (sometimes used in the context of “staying awake” or “getting work done”)
🔌 Dealers
Words: Plug, Connect
Emojis:
🔌 📦 💵
☠️ Fentanyl (Synthetic Opioid)
What It Is: Extremely potent synthetic opioid (50–100x stronger than morphine). Leading cause of accidental overdoses in the U.S.
Words/Slang: Fenty, Fetty, F, China Girl, Dance Fever
Emojis:
💀 ⚰️ 🧪 💊 🐉
Important Note: Fentanyl is often disguised or hidden within other drug references, especially emojis for pills such as 💊 or 🔵 (commonly used to represent counterfeit prescription pills). Many of these pills are illegally pressed to look like Xanax, Percocet, or Oxycodone but actually contain fentanyl.
⚠️ Risk: Even one pill can be lethal. Many counterfeit Xanax, Percocet, and Oxy pills are actually fentanyl-laced. Parents should treat any mention of pills online as a possible fentanyl risk.
⚠️ Parent Tip: If you see unusual patterns of these words or emojis in your child’s texts, DMs, or social media, it may be worth a gentle conversation. Not every use means drug involvement, but awareness is the first step to prevention.
What to do if you spot concerning codes
Pause > Ask > Context. “I saw ‘LMIRL’-what does that mean to you?” Stay calm; you’re trying to keep the communication channel open. (Experts emphasize context and conversation over immediate punishment.)
Screenshot & save evidence (before it disappears), then report grooming/sextortion to the NCMEC CyberTipline; consider local law enforcement.
If sextortion is suspected: follow FBI guidance (don’t go along with the sextortion request; preserve messages; involve trusted adults; report).
Drug sales via emoji: document usernames, platform, and posts; report in-app and to authorities (DEA mapping helps you interpret).
How to Teach This (Fast and Effectively)
Kids don’t need a lecture; they need tools they can use in real time. The best way to teach acronyms, emojis, and hidden codes is to fold them naturally into the awareness games you’re already practicing, like the What If Game and the 10-Second Rule.
1. Use Scenarios They Recognize
Turn common online slang into quick safety drills:
“If you see 🍆🍑💦 in a DM, what do you do?” → Don’t reply. Screenshot it. Tell a trusted adult.
“If someone messages LMIRL (Let’s Meet in Real Life), how do you respond?” → No contact. Screenshot. Block. Tell us.
“What if a friend uses KMS or KYS in a chat?” → Take it seriously. Check in. Tell an adult immediately.
2. Practice in Short Bursts
Just like the 10-Second Rule, keep it quick. Use car rides, dinner time, or while waiting at a restaurant as natural teaching moments. The point is repetition in everyday life, making it a habit, not a lecture.
3. Build a Family Glossary
Keep a printed or digital glossary in a place everyone can see like the fridge or a shared family note on your phones. Update it regularly with new slang and symbols. Let your kids help add to it, they’ll feel included rather than policed.
4. Stay Updated (Check Weekly if Needed)
Slang and emoji codes change quickly, sometimes in a matter of weeks. Make it part of your routine to check trusted resources like:
Bark (updated lists of slang and acronyms)
DEA “Emoji Drug Code” chart (symbols tied to drug references)
Parent safety organizations (such as InternetSafety101 and Common Sense Media)
Local law enforcement / school resource officers (often share current trends)
Set a reminder to review these resources at least monthly- or weekly if your child is active online.
5. Reinforce With Positives
When your child catches a code word, praise them for noticing. The goal is to train active awareness, not create fear. Make it a game: “Who can spot a new slang word first this week?”
6. Keep Conversations Open
Remind your kids: “You won’t get in trouble for telling us what you’ve seen.” If they know they can come to you without punishment, they’re far more likely to report concerning messages before it escalates.
Closing Thoughts
Protecting children from toddler to teen requires consistent effort, open communication, and proactive planning. Safety isn’t about instilling fear, it’s about building confidence, awareness, and trust. By teaching situational awareness, setting firm boundaries, and reinforcing rules through real-world scenarios, parents equip their children with lifelong tools to recognize danger and respond appropriately. Remember, predators and unsafe situations often rely on secrecy, confusion, or hesitation. Arming your child with knowledge and rehearsed responses takes that power away. While no plan is perfect, the ongoing conversations, repeated practice, and your willingness to stay engaged will make your children safer, stronger, and more prepared for whatever challenges they may face.
